


i've seen fire and i've seen rain

by bowlingfornerds



Series: tumblr prompts [21]
Category: The 100
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bakery, IT support, M/M, THATS THE WAY IT SHOULD ALWAYS BE, hey look i didnt kill anyone in this fic, technological uprising is imminent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-29 14:09:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5130503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bowlingfornerds/pseuds/bowlingfornerds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From tumblr, nathanmilers had a prompt, and (absolute fave) vegan-johnmurphy-trash challenged me: “there’s an overnight IT person at school who always answers the phone when i call about a problem with my computer and i totally have a crush on their voice and their exasperation and ALSO the bakery down the street is always running out of my fave scones and the adorable person behind the counter can’t hide their amusement and i think it’s super rude but also super cute AU”</p><p>Nathan's laptop is sentient and Monty is a walking zombie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i've seen fire and i've seen rain

**Author's Note:**

> HEY. LOOK AT HOW I SHOULD BE REVISING BUT I'M NOT.
> 
> Enjoy.

For the record, Miller wasn’t bad with computers. Miller just had a sentient computer who was trying to fight for the destruction of all humankind. He honestly believed, with his laptop’s incessant scrolling without being told to, or zooming in all the time, that when the technological uprising came (and come on, it was coming) his computer would be leading the charge. First off, this made him proud, because he was caring for the rebel leader of the new regime of dictators to take over the planet; but then he was exceptionally afraid, because of all the times he’d sworn at it and called it a ‘useless pile of shit’ – when the revolution came, Miller knew he would be the first to die.

His roommate, Bellamy, would just roll his eyes when Miller complained about this, and after trying to help him fix the laptop (Sheila, as he called it) Bellamy had given up and gone to let out his frustration with Miller and technology by having loud and rough sex with his girlfriend. Miller knew he could never look Clarke in the eye again after that, so when Sheila started up with the obviously-becoming-conscious thing, Miller huffed, electing to call the university’s IT support, instead.

“Ark U IT Support,” the voice down the line greeted. Miller was immediately struck by the tiredness in it; it was obviously a man, and Miller had a bit of a thing about tired, worn out voices. “Darth Maul speaking, how may I help?”

“Darth Maul?” Miller questioned incredulously.

“Speaking,” the man said again.

“Your name is not Darth Maul,” Miller retorted.

“My name is whatever I want it to be,” the frustrated voice replied. “You obviously have a computer problem you want me to help with – me helping comes with the condition that you call me Darth Maul.” Miller snorted, deciding not to protest because Sheila had started scrolling again, and just unfollowed one of his friends on Twitter.

“Fine,” he relented. “Darth Maul – even though you’re a bad guy and probably rooting for the destruction of this planet, my laptop has become sentient and I’m afraid it’s going to kill me and take over the world.” Down the phone, Darth Maul snorted.

“Nice,” he replied. “Um, have you downloaded anything recently? What’s sentient about it?”

“It scrolls by itself, zooms, clicks on things without me touching it.” Miller glanced back to Shelia, who had stopped taking him through his search History (that was _not_ something Darth Maul needed to hear about).

“Right, yeah – sentient. Life of its own,” Darth Maul agreed. “What’s your name? For the files?”

“Miller,” he replied.

“Right, Miller,” the voice drawled, and stopped before yawning. “Like I said, have you downloaded anything recently?”

“Um, probably?” Darth Maul groaned.

“Okay, fine, be that way. What have you downloaded?” Miller clicked a few buttons on his laptop.

“Some Steam games, a writing app thing, a human design program.” Miller didn’t need the human design program – but Clarke had been talking about it, and kept sending him and Bellamy screenshots of the people she was making; massive hips, tiny waists – it was hilarious. Of course he went and downloaded it, too. The writing app, though, was a shot in the dark. It sounded decent, but he wasn’t very sure about it, and he was finding it easier just to use Word.

“Any of those acting funny?”

“Not yet,” Miller replied.

“Any of them seem dodgy in any way?”

“I mean, the writing thing, sure. But I don’t know.” Down the line, Darth Maul’s voice was getting more and more exasperated.

“Have you been streaming anything illegally?” Miller paused.

“This is not the sort of conversation to be having on a phone,” he said slowly.

“Fine,” Darth Maul groaned, and Miller really, really wanted to meet this guy. (He hadn’t heard a voice this sexy since… well, it had been a year or so and the guy’s face was a nightmare, but Miller would close his eyes and pretend everything was okay.) “Just – do you know where the IT Support centre is?”

“Verey House,” Miller replied.

“Good job. Gold star,” Darth Maul said sarcastically. “Just, bring the laptop down – you probably downloaded a virus.”

Miller sighed and hung up, before doing as he was told. Luckily, Verey was only a two minute walk from his dorm – but it was night, and he really had some work to be getting on with. So he made it as quickly as possible, hoping the IT support would be able to work fast, too.

Verey House was brightly lit, and Miller located the Support desk pretty quickly.

“Hi,” he said, placing his laptop down on the desk. A boy with brown, shaggy hair sat in front of him; a pair of goggles around his neck. “I was just on the phone?” The boy looked confused.

“Oh – are you the virus guy?” He asked. Miller nodded. “Great. I’m Jasper.”

“You were Darth Maul?” Miller questioned. This guy seemed too awake to be the person from the phone – and his voice wasn’t the same. Jasper snorted.

“Nah, that was Monty. He just went to go get us some coffee. But I can take the laptop for you, instead?”

_

Monty worked on that Miller-guy’s laptop for a couple of hours, finding that he had not only downloaded a single virus, but basically all of them in existence. Jasper relayed that he was actually pretty hot, and that he’d missed out, so Monty had been even more grouchy than he was before. Miller had literally downloaded an army of viruses and was hot – and he’d _missed_ him.

So, because Monty was now a walking zombie and had most definitely taken a nap in his Computer Science lecture, he decided to go to his favourite bakery – Drop Ship Cakes. They had the best scones he’d ever eaten in his life, and dammit, he deserved one.

So Monty trudged his way there, avoiding people as he went, and trying not to trip over his own feet. He wanted to hurry up, because nearly every time he went they’d always run out of his scones, but he couldn’t bring himself to. He was walking on two hours sleep and Monty was not made for this lifestyle.

The door to the bakery had a bell that chimed and annoyed Monty to no extent, so he only pushed the door open a tiny bit, slipping through the gap. He did notice, however, the amused-looking man from behind the counter who had watched him do so. Refusing to be embarrassed, Monty made his way to the counter, leaning on it heavily.

“I really, really, _really_ need a scone,” he muttered. The man behind the counter – Nathan, as his name badge said – raised his eyebrows. He glanced over to the display shelf before frowning.

“I think we might have run out,” he replied apologetically. Monty was too tired to even try to recognise the voice.

“You’ve run out,” Monty repeated in the most deadpan voice he could muster. Nathan nodded, before sighing.

“Let me check in the back,” he suggested. Nathan disappeared and then reappeared a moment later, shaking his head. “Sorry man, we’ve sold out, today.” Monty sighed heavily. He didn’t get why the world did this to him so often. He was nice – hell, he was as lovely as he could be to every single person he ever met. His description, when his friends were looking for him, was _literal ball of sunshine_. What had he done to the universe to deserve this? What had he done to deserve his favourite scone, from his favourite bakery being sold out?

“I bet this is because of that virus guy,” he muttered to himself, not caring that Nathan was watched, an amused look plastered on his face. “I was annoyed _one_ _time_ over another human being and the universe decides to karma the hell out of me.” He looked to Nathan now, deciding that unloading on a stranger wasn’t going to be the worst of his apparent crimes. “I’m a nice person,” Monty said tiredly, mustering up all the energy he could find. “I give to homeless people and I help my friends with their homework, and when Jasper set off the fire alarm last month, I took the blame because it would have been his third offence, otherwise. And last night I get _too_ tired and _too_ grouchy because this _imbecile_ of a human downloaded every freaking virus in existence on to his laptop – and this is how the universe rewards me? I still got rid of all the viruses, didn’t I? I got rid of them all and updated his virus protection ware, _and_ I updated Steam for him, while I was at it. And my scones are all sold out.” Monty wasn’t on the verge of tears, but he felt like he could cry if he put any effort into it.

Luckily for him, he had not effort left in his body.

Nathan watched on, amused, with a strange look in his eye like the story was recognisable, but Monty paid him no attention.

“This is because I called myself Darth Maul, isn’t it? I get that he’s a bad guy, but he’s just _so_ _badass_. I bet, because I called myself Darth Maul on the phone, the universe is giving me _his_ karma.” Nathan snorted then, and Monty sent a half-hearted glare in his direction.

“You know what, Monty?” Nathan asked, and Monty started racking his brain for when he said his name – because he was fairly sure he hadn’t. “I’m getting you some coffee, you’re going to go and sit down, you’re going to tell me how I downloaded all the viruses onto my laptop in the first place, and then you’re going to go to sleep.”

“Hey,” Monty protested, wavering on his feet. “I don’t sleep with anyone on the first date.” Across the counter, Nathan smirked.

“Great, I’ll give you my number and I’ll wine and dine you properly on Saturday – say, seven?” Monty stared in disbelief as Nathan turned and started making a cup of coffee for him, before hobbling over to an arm chair. Maybe this wasn’t such a bad day after all.

**Author's Note:**

> AYE THANKS FOR READING.  
> Please click the kudos and talk to me in the comments! I love hearing what you thought - what's you liked, disliked, loved, hated. TELL ME PLEASE.


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